Dear Ellis: 4 - Time to Take a Stand

Oh El, it's happened.

No one thought it would, but it has. And people are on fire about it. Dave Martin was elected as president.

This country has become a land of self-entitlement instead of community-building, where it's me versus you, instead of us versus life's intrinsic hardship that every one of us faces daily. People are waiting for someone to pop down and save them, to win the lottery, looking for someone to blame for their struggles, and blinding themselves to the reality that every single human around them is also fighting something, even if it's not what they them self are fighting on this particular day or in this specific moment. They no longer seem to understand that hard work earns things, because for many, working hard has earned them nothing but harder work, and THAT is what we need to change to fix ourselves, not pushing out those who are different or blaming someone else. Blame the greedy, blame the fear-mongers, blame those who divide us and insight violence and anger, blame ourselves for allowing ourselves to be lead away from basic human values for ALL.

Too few of Janus's supporters actually gave credance to the chance that Martin could defeat Janus. Part of me knew it was indeed a risk, but didn't want to allow it into the realm of possibility. But he promised fix the crumbling economy, with so many losing their jobs, so many fighting just to feed, clothe and shelter their families, and they believed. Within a country full of corrupt Congressmen and wealthy, power-hungry businessmen with sway over far too much, he promised to fight that corruption despite himself being one of the wealthy, power-hungry businessmen, and they believed. He fed into their fear of terrorist violence, fed into their (often false) belief that anyone immigrating into our melting-pot of a country, built on freedom and opportunity, would steal their own freedom and opportunity, and they believed, instead of welcoming new comrades to fight those corrupt and greedy few that push us ALL down, not just them. They may not have believed in his racist and bigoted remarks, but they believed he could restore a feeling of safety and hope that they hadn't had in a long time, and that he would fight for them.

The divide grows and grows... Martin supports are cheering, and bashing Janus supporters for supporting yet another corrupt politician. Janus supporters are horrified that Martin supporters would elect someone so divisive, who shines a spotlight on blaming groups of people for things that are not their fault, who supports bullying others and ostracizing those who look different, or live or believe differently.

Janus supporters are attacking Martin supporters for being hateful and racist and bigots and sexists because Martin's speeches make him out to be and they are the ones who chose to elect him. They accept no perspective that Janus supporters are people who are afraid, and that fear was used against them, that they too are parents, daughters, sons, sisters, brothers, and Americans all seeking a less troubled and worrisome life. I am not approving of their choice, but I can try to understand it, so I can understand them.

Martin supporters lash back that Janus supporters need to "get over it" and that "the people have spoken", despite Martin winning the electoral votes by state by only the slimmest of margins, and losing the popular, by-citizen vote, again by only the slimmest of margins. It shows our divide like a neon sign on a dark night that the race was so close.

Janus supporters call Martin & his followers "bullies", yet they bully just as much, believing they are righteous in their actions and hurtful words because they are aimed at "ignorant racists bigots", not at people disillusioned by corporate political corruption, by a terrible economy for all, by wanting to feel safe and secure in their right to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. Martin's followers justify their bullying with their "triumph" in the election, that Janus followers are just sheep too busy following the status quo to see how corrupt the world has become, or are socialist liberal lazies who want everything handed to them for free.

Martin's whole campaign gave the impression of approving "speaking your mind" despite who is offended by your viewpoints, and that precedent now continues in the words and actions of his compatriots, and it seems, Janus's compatriots are following suit, instead of standing up for the values they had so loudly claimed to hold for so long - respect and equality for ALL.

Janus supporters express a sarcastic snide desire to watch Martin fail miserably, even if it means the failure of our nation as a whole. Whereas I myself want to work even harder toward a better world for my children.

If I see bigotry, I will speak up. If I see racism or sexism, I will speak up. I will not give up nor go blindly along whatever path we are lead, but I will also not focus on blame, the way Martin has and now Janus supporters are. I will focus on anything I myself can do as one small human in a big ocean of life to evolve that ocean into something more beautiful. I will not attack a Martin supporter simply for their support of him. I will acknowledge what made them afraid, I will acknowledge their desire to work and earn a "good" life for themselves and their families, if that is what they do desire. I will stand beside my Muslim sisters and my gay brothers and my dark-skinned cousins and my immigrant family if they are down-trodden, and I will also stand beside my fearful brothers and my poor sisters and my homeless family, that they too may grow the life they seek, for that is also the life that I seek.

I will not give up, I will not give in, but I will not hate and I will not hurt, it is not who I am, and I do not truly believe it is who the many are. Perhaps the few, but we outnumber them, and it is our time to take a stand, together.

Dear Ellis: 3 - Hijab on Fire

Dear El,

Dave Martin just announced he'd support pushing our fine country back a few decades or so... Punishing women for having abortions (um, what about the men who knocked the woman up??!? No punishment there, of course...) and allowing business owners to discriminate based on religious values. Ok, so maybe it starts with someone refusing a gay couple a wedding cake, but who's to say, then, that someone else could refuse to serve dark skinned people again claiming it was religious, or refusing to do business with someone who then gets upset by it and refuses to leave the place of business, would they then have the right to shoot said "customer"? I can see people these days using that excuse to just outright shoot someone, I really can, and how sad is THAT?

Life here is getting unreal very quickly... I just saw a video of a group of men who ganged up on a Muslim woman, born in this country (but god forbid she wear a hijab out in public! Celebrities can go out wearing nothing but pasties covering their breasts, but to cover oneself fully? Unacceptable!), and no lie, they poured gasoline on her and LIT HER ON FIRE! I haven't heard if she even survived, but I would feel worse for her if she did, honestly. To suffer burns like that, and wake up scarred both outside and inside, knowing hatred like that could still be so prevalent in this supposedly "civilized" country... To murder someone over a head covering? Really? She did nothing wrong, and yet she was accosted. Who's next, then? The guy wearing a purple shirt, regardless of his true sexual orientation, but assumed to be a "faggot" by some bigot? We argue over transgender bathroom rights, but never consider basic morality and our human commonalities... Do we not share the same DNA, the same bone structures, the same blood and oxygen to breathe? To think a group of people could all simply think of such actions as doing the world a "favor" and "defending the Christian faith" instead of what they truly are, horrific assault and likely the MURDER of an innocent, simply because she calls their common god "Allah" instead of "God" or "Yahweh". And knowing that so many who hold hatred toward Muslims, gays, and anyone different gather weekly in stone temples to worship a savior who preached "love your neighbor as yourself" and "turn the other cheek" and "judge not or you will be judged more harshly".

Too many criticize the Koran for its inequality of women, yet the Bible does the same. Books written during a time period in our history when women had no equality would then be written by men believing those societal norms, and write within that context, regardless of the name of the God who inspired the words. And is it so hard to educate oneself that a "jihad" is a moral battle within oneself between the desires of the flesh, desires for power and greed and instant gratification versus living according to moral values and healthy choices, not a war against "infidels" in first world nations. And that Christianity ran around murdering people for not believing in their god during the Crusades, Nazi's went around murdering millions for their worship of Yahweh - yet we forget those parts, and simply judge the extreme Islamist's for doing it now, as if such things had never been done before ever. And judge every member of their faith for the actions of the few. Especially since most humans would never move toward such violence if they were not pushing back against violence against them, killing their fathers and mothers and children and ability to live in peace, as we have done to so many Muslim people in a covert attempt to steal their land and their oil in our many attacks of the Middle East.

Sorry for my ranting, but I get so upset lately, because this stupid election has opened my eyes to just how many people actually support Martin and Conrad in their anger and blame aimed at anyone "different", as if they conspired to make our lives difficult. Life is simply difficult sometimes, life is simply unfair sometimes, and those battles are what teach us to evolve and grow, to become better. But it is harder to allow change than it is to throw blame, right?

I go online and see people you know are educated, who have daughters they love, families that are imperfect, lives that are decent, who support Martin and his belittling of women in some foolish solidarity with his "business sense" and his "strength" of "character". Don't they see he wants our daughters to think they must be visually perfect to be considered worthy, and only if they keeps their mouth shut, legs open, and their husbands' dinners hot on the table? Can't they see that he wants to bomb children in far away lands who only want what we all want, to live in peace, and whose parents are willing to die to defend their children from his bombs, just like we would be willing to do if it were OUR children? And with every bomb, another terrorist is born, as they watch their family dying in their arms at the dropping of yet another American attack...

Don't they see that the gay man spit upon in the pizza shop could be their son one day, and the mother needing that abortion could be their sister after being raped?

A disgustingly rich man who hasn't paid but pennies compared to his billions in the bank into our country's tax system isn't a "smart guy" who would know how to run the business of our country. He knows how to swindle the system for his own best interest, and those interests of his business partners and friends. He'll swindle all of us if we allow it! But no, our country's financial issues are caused by the pennies we give to single moms who chose to not have those abortions (because pro-life ends at BIRTH here, kids! Better have that baby but don't ask us for help to give it a LIFE no no!), not "successful" business men like Martin, who stash their money here and there, buy failing companies so they can claim "losses" despite earning millions, and do nothing but TAKE from the system and the country. It's those "damn immigrants" who do the jobs no one in this country wants to do any more, like working hard to earn dirt pay, and often do pay taxes, but they're "stealing jobs" away from "hardworking Americans". It's not the businessmen like Martin who hire Chinese kids (at even worse wages) to mass produce their goods to sell in America for huge profits, no no, that has NOTHING to do with our lack of jobs. It has nothing to do with our dissolving work ethic (just give us money, we want to watch reality TV and do nothing to earn it..>) and sense of entitlement, no!!!

Let's just go burn poor helpless Muslim women in the streets and post videos of it... Because that's going to make our country amazing again. For white, middle class Christians, that is. Or is it?

Love always,
your quickly-becoming-jaded sister,
Anna. #AnnaandEllis #DearEllis #HopeVali #politics #newbookidea #murica

Dear Ellis: 2 - Conrad

Dear El,

Today Sam Janus collapsed at a campaign event. His press people are just claiming he's exhausted from the travel and constant debates with Martin. Funny that Martin is older, yet seems more able to withstand the pressure perhaps? The online tizzy is that Janus is really gravely ill and hiding it for the election, because Martin simply cannot be allowed into office. People are consistently comparing Martin to a Hitler-type personality, power hungry, bigoted, ruling with the iron fist of fear and violence. Yet others deny the risk - how could one man end up with so much power in a government designed to prevent tyrants or kings, how could one man surpass all the checks and balances within to usurp more than any man before him for 300 years? I myself worry, but I worry about his powerful friends, his Congressional alliances, his zealous supporters eating up every hateful word with which he paints blame upon the lesser loved "labels" of our society. He's already threatened to kick anyone Muslim out of the country, a country who's very first Constitutional Amendment guarantees people here the right to practice the religion of their choosing. His Vice Presidential running mate, Gabe Conrad, is a politician who pushes back against the rights of gays and lesbians, votes against bills that maintain equality for women, and publicly pushes his beloved Christianity as if it should be the new Sharia Law.

Have you ever heard of Dominionists? I was looking into this Gabe Conrad online and he's a scary dude, and a dominionist - a group of people who truly believe that our country should be a Christian country, laws based on the laws of the Bible, where all people should be "saved" in the light of Jesus. Dominionists began the 7 Mountains Movement, citing a piece of the end of days story in Revelations from the Bible. They believe that society has 7 pillars or pieces - Business, Education, Family, Government, Media, Religion, and Arts/Entertainment (although some push Arts/Entertainment in with Media and claim the 7th pillar as the Military). That if a group could gain control of all 7 pillars, they would gain control of everything in society. Control people's money through business, control their laws through government, control the information they do and do not have access to through the media, control opinions of things through their movies and TV shows, control what the children are raised to believe, to question, to know, through education... And if you think about it, right now conservative Christians do control a great deal of those things already. Throughout the primary elections, many people online were refuting information being feed to the masses via "news" outlets, owned by giant corporations with vested interest in the electoral outcomes. Corporations have been exerting power over Congress for years through lobbying and pushing cooperative candidates into House and Senate seats to do their bidding.

Slowly, religion is indeed taking over these pieces of everyday life without the rest of us even realizing it. Slow change is far harder to recognize, therefore highly effective. While we are too busy fighting over sports teams, watching reality television shows, arguing over the validity of common core teaching methods, blaming welfare recipients for our high taxes, and jumping into new wars over oil rights, people we've never met and know not their names are inaudibly taking over each aspect of these 7 mountains while we "sleep".

All this information is very new to me, and only because I happened to start playing around online to look into Gabe Conrad, and only because Janus got sick. I thought to myself, well what would happen if one of these idiots is elected, and their VP ends up president? Shouldn't I know who I'm voting for in that situation? And Conrad looks worse than Martin!!! He's a dominionist, Ellis. How scary is THAT...

Will write again soon,
always,
Anna.

#AnnaAndEllis #DearEllis #HopeVali #politics #newbookidea #murica

Dear Ellis: 1 - Blue Light Lies

My dearest El,

I suppose I owe you a letter... I hope these words find you happy and healthy on the other side of the world. I wish you were here beside me, discussing this hot mess of a country in which you've left me. I honestly cannot blame you one bit for getting out - it feels like every day people are growing angrier and angrier, yet still frightened underneath it all. Scared of money. Scared of health issues. Scared of money. Scared of other people, and themselves as well. They hide from the fear in television shows about the wealthy, the famous, being followed around portrayed as "having it all", yet to me, having absolutely nothing. Yet we are convinced that what they have is what we want. Desires broken up into 11 minute moments, cut with commercials offering a younger face, fancier cars to drive the same route our perfectly good-enough cars could drive, but BETTER. Offering a pill or a shot or a spray to heal every ailment one might come up with having, whether we have them or not, we need that pill to fix our failed lives! Or at least that's what the pretty lady running through the field wants us to believe... Airwaves cluttered with contestants fighting to win that dream prize, athletes pushing every boundary (including the legal ones) to WIN WIN WIN the next turf-carpeted war, news feeds that push our fears up and convince us that everyone around us could be that bad man, that terrorist, that rapist or thief, so that we barely even trust our own selves any more in our cloud of worry.

So many of these moving pictures make me feel my own brain cells dying... Humor at others' expense, humor at jokes an 8 year old tells, humor that's not humorous but for the recorded laughter leading us toward the desire to fit in and laugh along, regardless of our own senses. And how can it be "news" if the story I see before me compares little to the posted youtube and facebook videos going viral showing another, vastly different perspective of the same situation?

Aggression floods this society, its power and fear expanding, blaming race, gender, religion, for all the wrongs we each face. As if we humans faced no battles before we divided ourselves by labels, before we put ourselves on pedestals of entitlement and perfection-demanding judgmentalism. People know more about their sports team players than they do their own neighbors now. They truly believe they know more about the intentions and desires of everyone else, while blinding themselves to their own, because it is so much easier to point those fingers away, out, at someone else, than at one's own heart and one's own reflected truth.

And now we are asked to yet again choose leaders for ourselves, our broken, failing, desperate selves. So our choices, mimicking the destracted chaos we've created around us, have become the Corrupt Liar and the Power-hungry Fear-monger. So much hatred is spewed daily between and around the two, like bullets across the field of battle, as chants of "We are right! You are wrong!" echo from both sides in unison, at top volume and in vain (or is it in vanity?).

On one side we have Sam Janus, who panders to the middle-minded folk, nefariously feigning at genuinity, while hiding the reigns behind held by old money's silent machine. While Dave Martin rallies unease, despair, apprehension, and suspicion, offering strong-handed change, conforming ideals of safety, and the return to some antique guise of "how it used to be". Yet such memories are but dreams with forgotten foes and hardship, far from authenticity, but enticing no less to those hurting and afraid. Directing blame like one directs a movie instead of inspiring hope and new ideas impresses advantageously those minds already so easily distracted by television and cell phone games, the blue light lies and obsessive addictions of the majority, the sheep so self righteous in the "truth" they are fed at the hands of their herder de jour. And I want to scream "Wake UP!" and yet am weighted by the understanding that such screams would be futile, unheard and unwanted, ignored and denied.

I cannot imagine (or perhaps I can and simply desire not to) what the "outside world" must think of us - the spoiled rich kids of the planet, who just won't get a clue, baptized in their arrogance and bathed in their wastefulness, and hanging out with the "wrong crowd" in their preference of leaders.

The dissenting minds such as mine are not uncommon but we are also far from the majority, those bandwagon riders of Pandering vs. Mongering, who stout-heartedly reject choices beyond the two. But to be fair, I suppose, the concept of powerlessness is all we are taught, all we are surrounded by and sold, on television sets, by preachers and by internet comrades. We are bred to pick a side, then surround ourselves with only compatriots, to cull all challengers, removing any dissent from our ears. One perspective, a singularity of choice, births but greater confidence in said choice, I guess. Because to consider anything else might begin to degrade said choice, to move rationality toward doubt, to leave one open to the potential of being WRONG, and that, to most, is unacceptable, unconscionable, unthinkable. And we can't have that, now can we?

It will be very interesting to observe these moments in time, I suppose. Although, I do so with beads of dread mixed with the curiosity and aspiration of hope, because I really hope we don't f*ck things up too badly this time around... Wish us luck.

All my love, always,
Anna

#AnnaandEllis #DearEllis #HopeVali #politics #newbookidea #murica

Eyes afire

His gait reminded her of the swaying of weeping willow branches, flowing in some unseen breeze, thin but full of a confidence only the comfort of long limbs and old roots can grow over time.

Sun kissed soft skin and deep ocean eyes, but a fire burnt on angry memories of bridges barely survived hid within.

Vocal chords played both lows and highs, whispers and woes, rarely voluminous, yet always with a wisdom seeming to just know.

And she believed him. In everything, she believed. She believed in him. In everything, she did believe. Except that he could lay his past down at hardened feet, to let it go, to allow her to tread beyond its scars, it’s waging’s and wars, so he might walk beside her, ever forward, hand in hand.

He believed her. In everything, he believed. Except that she could believe in him, love him, to trust her with a future beyond his past, and that he could walk beside her, not behind.

So they danced without dancing, for he never would dance, despite his grace in length and form and art. He danced a dance only she could see, only she could hear, only she could sing along to, if only he would allow it; the dance of a tomorrow never feigned, untrusted and unkind, it’s rhythm always in rewind, chaotic in his mind, his blind sweet blue eyes, always on fire.

For even the deepest ocean will burn,
if fed enough fuel.

waiting... to rise.

She speaks as if someone with true experience. Her words are so specifically chosen that you almost pity them, so micromanaged inside that mind. Her tones communicate self righteousness, while her ideas communicate humility, a manner confusing in it's intent. Perhaps that is the purpose, to confuse just enough so that none may assume to know true meaning at any time. Perhaps it is just her self defense mechanism. We all have them, and we tend to deny those we use most.

She drives me to frustration regularly, but I am grateful she has been named the one to teach our children. Something about her confidence gives them confidence in her, in her words & teachings to them. I've yet to hear her lie to them or not admit when she is unsure. But only to them.

Her tones change around the young ones. From one who knows better than adults to one who is only inspired by evolving minds, one who desires to provoke thinking and debating, questioning and observing, guessing and imagining, learning and discovering. And so, no matter my personal opinions of her relating to myself and my peers, she was our greatest asset to prod the children's minds, pushing them to become the wisest adults we could ask for.

And is that not our purpose as parents, to push our children to surpass ourselves?

Perhaps that is why she relates to them far better than any of the parents, because we are cookies that have already been baked, and they are just potential filled dough, waiting for her hands to kneed it, waiting
to rise.

heavy beyond weight

"At first there were just a couple of us. Trying to find water, trying to keep moving. The first little town we came across, we searched 'til we found one of those Army stores. Guns, ammo, camping gear, fishing equipment, batteries, lights, emergency rations, canteens, everything we needed in one place. Then we just kept going, finding people here and there along our way. We didn't stick around too long with any, though. We were all better off that way. Too much weight, carrying too many people, no, we needed to stay just a quick few, light & ready.
Most groups we ran into assumed on sight that we were some kind of movie-style militia, hoping to kill, rob, rape & pillage. Thank God television is gone, after all the good THAT's done us." He smiled, adding, "But we just know how to travel," as he looked around, as if to say, 'look at all this, around your camp, all this baggage'.
And yet, he & I both knew the truth. He traveled so lightly because he already carried a heaviness beyond his own weight, deep within himself, with every step he took.